Morning babe

Having him slip into bed fully clothed and rubbing up and snuggling in, wiggling my bottom in his crotch... does indeed make the man unbutton those pants and decide that going to work smelling like sex is a good thing.

It also makes slipping in the smart balls easier having the "natural" lube. From here on out at least two hours a day trying to keep them up there. I dont understand it. the first time I used them it was cake keeping them up where they where supposed to be, now they slip down on me so I have to tighten those muscles up, for him yes... but more so for me. It is my irritation that made me vow to two hours a day. Either that or I made the vow because of how totally amazing it feels to have on the the little weighted balls shift inside the bigger one and send a tingle up my spine.

We came up with a little new "rule" too, he absolutely hates it when I wear my hair in a certain way, so from here on out when I do I have to wear the smart balls or the baby butt plug when I wear my hair that way. He is also allowed to check and make sure I haven't forgot and respond accordingly.

The problem with this is that at home its easy to reinsert the balls, away from home not so easy. So until I can keep them up where they are supposed to be I reckon the anal plug would have to be worn when I leave the house.

I wonder what I got myself into because to be honest, I really like wearing my hair like that... it keeps it off my neck...

Yesterday was delightful as I got bent over a large pillow and he smacked my ass a bit with his plastic.. things? I dunno what they are but they feel good. They are my favorite and do not really hurt but make the ass welt up and get nice and red for him. He then fucked me silly after putting some clips on my pussy lips. We ended that session with smart ball practice and our new "deal"

O O O

Much to my amusement he tried the dab of vicks on his own ass yesterday. His revalations with it in where priceless. :)

Oh and for the record, that damn ball is big for my mouth! It bothers my jaw. I have a small mouth you see... and we did get the smallest ball. So now I am pondering what to do . It is sexy as hell though ;)

What are you going to do?

Guilt snuck in followed by confession. Blaming him for something that I was part of too but I didn't admit my part at first.

He whispers in my ear, "What are you going to do about that, to make up for it?"

Tingling feelings rushing through my cunt wondering how a sentence can do that. "Finish the wrist cuffs that you where nice enough to say I could make to sleep in every night instead of the leather ones..."

"What else," he replies.

More tingles.... "Finish the contract and make it a longer length of time like you asked?"

"What else," he replies.

"Make sure the positions are practiced before we go to bed?"

"What else," he replies.

I am quiet, searching for the magic sentence he wants.

"What is a good pet going to do NOW to make up for it?"

It ends riding on top of Sir rocking back and forth, trying to slam onto his hips with the same force he is rising up and thrusting himself into me. Feeling him pinch my nipples harder and harder the closer he gets... my head imagining that this nipple pain wasn't for me but for him, because he wanted my nipples to hurt and throb when he filled up my pussy with this hot load of come.

I knew better than to ask to come myself.

I broke a rule.
I hid a rule.

I broke a rule.
I tried to hide it.
In hiding it, I made Sir feel bad.

I was wrong, very wrong, and more honest with him last night than I feel I have been in a very long time.

I am deeply sorry for what happened last night Sir.

A Vow to Make Things Right

Making things right.

I made a vow last night to make things right. Sir was wonderful in his plannings and I totally dissed him. I was hurting some, I denied some... yet even when I wasn't hurting earlier in the day I ignored. Once more he knew I hurt and massaged me and I still denied. If I where to go back further I masturbated twice without him home ... without permission, and with the new clover clamps. I could get into the "why" of it all but in the end it doesn't matter.

In reading I realized that it wouldn't even be any fun to "punish" if there was no trying to please in the first place. I am pushing, and honestly in the forums I have been reading they do say ignore them if they push, they are supposed to remember and try to please.

I vowed to make things right.

This morning I took the pictures he has been demanding I take off and on for weeks. This morning I poured the hot oil on my fingertips and worked it into my clit. This morning I took the butt plug and poured the hot oil over it to coat it as I inserted it into my ass. I then sat on the bed with my legs crossed forcing it in further as I applied the clover clamps to my nipples and meditated.

I reminded myself that my clit is his and I used it without permission for my gratification, I reminded myself that I used the clamps even though we decided to use them for the first time on a alone day, and I used them to get off. I then reminded myself that the burning taking place in my ass was for refusing him to touch it last night... and I reminded myself of the look of disappointment on his face last night before we slept.

I will not shower and get ready for him to come home until after the burning has subsided.

Today is preparation... of my making things up to him.

I will make up a schedule of tackling RL events and he will come home to it waiting for him. In this document I will add various things of which he can choose for me to do or make his own demand.

I will put a smile on his face so he is pleased with me again. The next 24 plus hours will be his and I will go to the extreme to make up for my actions.

I am sorry Sir.

After Sir see's the new picture I took today I will share that if he so wishes as well. Or perhaps he will... we will see what happens

My New Rules

Sir and I had a long talk tonight.

He came home and rubbed my puss and fingered me for awhile and walked out the door. :( He made me stay at home and masturbate. I had to make it good because I was not going to get to cum later.

Later he made me lean over the bed while he held my arms behind my back and grabbed my hair and fucked me until he exploded in my cunt. My favorite part is when his hot cum dripped out of my pussy and over my clit, it made me squirm and I am still so horny again I get wiggly just laying on my tummy writing the post.

Back to our talk... I have some rules, very few to start with but it is a start.

1. I must text message him every time I masturbate to orgasm during the day and make sure he knows how many orgasms I have a day. This might get me in trouble because I know I have told Sir no then masterbated later :( I masturbate more than he realizes.
2. My first sentence to Sir must be to ask him if there is anything I can do for him. This must happen every day or there will be punishment. If he leaves without me being awake or around I must text him asking the question.
   
3. I have to email him daily with at least one new sexual thing I have found out about. (tasks, ways to exercise sexually, new punishments and the like... ) My porn addiction now has a purpose and I am to constantly be thinking of him while I do it.
4. I have to wake him up at least once a month offering myself to him and giving him a blow job.
   
5. I am to spread my legs on command, I may no longer say no... ever. My body is his to use regardless of who is around. If someone catches us he will deal with it but I will never stop him from touching me however he wishes. This includes nipples and my ass. If we are having a disagreement, he still has the right to remind me that I am his and must follow this rule.
6. I must make sure all toys are clean and have batteries at all times, if Sir wants to use them they must be ready for him immediately.

That is pretty much it for now. I am really bad with spreading on command. I have told him no a lot or moved his hand. I am his, this will change.

I asked for this change, because he has always allowed me to touch him and never pulled away. It is time for me to give him the same gift in return.

Ultimately he is taking over our sex life so it meets his expectations. This may also include him fucking me and leaving me to masturbate myself afterwords to cum. I will no longer complain about non orgasms but request being able to masturbate, there may be times when I am not allowed to have an orgasm.

I have pretty much been in charge for the past 8 plus years of sex and am also responsible for the lack of sex. I have input, no longer final say.

I love you Sir, take me, use me... make me beg for more. I submit to you totally Sir, and I have never felt so good and so free ever in my life. I have finally let go, and give my soul to you.

*added number 6 for a new email rule that was sent to me this evening*